When Faith is Messy

Got your Bibles with you? Let's go to 1st Samuel chapter 21. 1st Samuel chapter 21. Church, there are chapters in the Bible that feel like highlight rules. They're the ones that we like to quote, the ones that we put on coffee mugs, the ones that really can preach themselves like David and Goliath, you know, uh the anointing head pulled on the anointing oil pulled on poured on the head in front of the brothers. A David writing songs that they've already lasted 3,000 years and people are going to keep on quoting them till the end of time. I mean, those are those are highlight reels. Those are the chapters that pump you up. Those are the chapters that make you feel victorious. They feel like faith is working exactly the way it's supposed to. Then you got chapter 21. And this is not a highlight reel. This is not a worship service. This this is not a moment that you hashtag. David is on the run. This chapter is awkward. It's sweaty. It's hungry. It's scared. There is no miracle in this chapter. God is silent in this chapter. There's no prophetic word spoken. But this is one of the most comforting chapters in all of scripture. And I hope it's a blessing to you because what 1st Samuel chapter 21 does is it's going to show us what happens when faith is real but messy. And it shows us that grace never stops. It shows us what it looks like when someone who genuinely belongs to God is exhausted, is afraid, is improvising, and just trying to survive the next hour. And if we're honest, those are the chapters that most of most of us live in a lot. So, chapter 21, it it's about us. You know, you love God, but you're tired. You believe his promises, but the pressure is loud. You're trying to serve him, but you're making mistakes all along the way. And you wonder sometimes, is God still working with me when I'm not doing my best? And this chapter answers that question. So, let's jump on in. 1st Samuel chapter 21. If you'all remember from last week, David is on the run. Saul has put a hit out on David. He's already used them for target practice having thrown at least two javelins at him and even one in his own son Jonathan for befriending David. So what David does is he runs to the city of Knob which is the city where the priests are and he comes alone and this is the first thing that we see. 1st Samuel chapter 21 verse1 the word of the Lord reads as follows. Then came David to knob to a Himc the priest and a himc was afraid. Stop. Hard. Stop. Why is the Himch afraid? Because words gotten to a Hima that there is a bounty on David's head. And the Himch doesn't want to put David and hide David because Saul does bad things to people that cross him. So Ahe himc is afraid. He's the priest and he's afraid. Let's keep on going. And Ahe himc was afraid at the meeting of David and said unto him, why art thou alone and no man with thee? Now, if you mark in your Bibles, that might want to be a cir a word that you circle that word alone because it's important because him's question kind of hangs in the air. Hey, David, why are you alone? What's going up? Because David is never alone. He's a commander. He's a leader. He's going to be the future king. He's a warrior. But now, now David's isolated. And so, you know, a himch isn't being really suspicious. It's almost like he's being pastoral. It's it's like David, something's not right. What's going on here? And listen, this is the bigger point. This is what fear is does to people. It isolates them. Fear does a lot of things, but one of the dangerous things that fear does is it isolates you. Because fear doesn't just threaten your safety. It threatens your sense of belonging. Fear can keep you from God's gift of community. Fear can cause you to pull back from people that love you. And this is what David answers. And I want you to notice something. He doesn't tell the truth. David lies. Verse two. And David said unto him the priest, notice how they threw that back in there. Himch the priest. The king hath commanded me a business and hath said unto me, "Let no man know anything of the business whereabout I send thee, and what I have commanded thee, and I have appointed my servants to such and such a place." Y'all dig that? David lies in the house of God to a priest. Like, why why are you alone, David? What's going on here? Uh Saul's giving me a secret mission that I can't tell you about. So let's just do that. David and he's not lying because he's evil, not because he's calculated. David is lying because he's afraid. This is not rebellion. This is this is panic. Has anybody here ever said anything that wasn't true? Not because you planned it, but just because fear grabbed the steering wheel before your brain showed up. I mean, you didn't mean to lie. You just talked. So, let's slow down here because I I don't want to rush past this moment. This is David. This is a man that Samuel said in 1st Samuel 13, I think it's verse 14. God told him, "This is a man after his own heart. This is David, the psalmist, the future king. And that matters because many of us have been taught either explicitly or implicitly, faithful people, man, they name it and claim it. Faithful people, they don't fear as if as if fear is like some sort of weakness. But here's the thing about scripture. Scripture is a lot more honest than most of us are. David here is not faithless. David is overwhelmed. And church, there's a difference because fear comes not because God has left you. Fear becomes comes because you're human living in a broken world. And here's the tension that the Bible refuses to resolve nicely. David is still chosen and he's scared. God's plan is still intact and David is still making stupid decisions. Both are true. And some of you today might be walking and living in that exact same tension. You love God. You trust him. But your nerves are fried. Your options feel thin. Your heart is racing. And maybe maybe you're making decisions you never thought you'd make. and and and you're you're wondering, "Have I messed up beyond repair?" 1st Samuel 21 gently says, "Nope. God is big. Let's keep on going." So, David is on the run. Now, remember, he was supposed to eat at the feast of the new moon, and Jonathan sent the arrows of flying, said some words, and David's like, "I got to take off." So, he's on the run. He hadn't eaten in a while. He's starving. So, we come up with verse three. And David asked a question. He says, "Hey, Ahemch, now therefore, what is under thy hand? Give me five loaves of bread in mine hand or what there is present." The priest answered David and said, "There is no common bread under my hand. But there is hallowed bread if the young men have kept themselves from women." So, I want to slow down here for a moment because this line would have landed a little bit more weight to the original hearer than it might do to us because a himch says there is is no common bread. Okay, that word common bread, that's everyday bread. That's ordinary bread. That's the wonderbread that you have in your cabinet. That's the kind you keep at home.

That's the kind that doesn't really come with instructions. In other words, the common bread is the kind that anybody could eat. But the Hima says we don't have any common bread. We have hallowed bread. And that's different because the hallowed bread, what scripture teaches us elsewhere also calls it uh the showbread. It's not a casual thing. And the law governs showbread in Leviticus 24:es 5-9. Because every Sabbath, what the people of Israel were to do and the priests were to do is they were to bake 12 fresh loaves of bread. Every single Sabbath. And they were to take that loaf of bread and they were taken into the holy place. Not the holiest of holies, but the holy place. And they would put it on the table of pure gold, which was a table made of acacia wood covered in pure gold. And they were lay it up in two rows of six. And they were to sit there for a week. Those loaves of bread represented the 12 tribes of Israel. Those loaves of bread represented the provision of God. Those loaves of bread also had another purpose because at the end of the Sabbath when it was another Sabbath, here come 12 new fresh loaves of bread. And those loaves of bread was supposed to go to the priest to eat and to no one else. And it was to be holy to the priest. And here comes David and he says, "Hey, give me some of give me at least five of those loaves. Give me give me give me some bread." Emil says, "I don't I don't have any. All I got is the showbread." And uh and and and I got some of the bread that that we had last Sabbath that we haven't quite finished eating. And David's like, "Give me that." A himch says something else, too. He says, "As long as your men haven't been with a woman." What a is doing is he's looking for a reason to show that to make to looking for a reason under the law that he can be allowed to show mercy. And that's a good thing because the bare minimum requirement to eat of a holy thing is that you be ceremonially clean. And so what a himch says is, you know, I'm not 100% sure about your people and their background, but here's what I know. What the law says is you can't eat holy things when you're unclean. And if your men have been with a woman, then they're unclean because that was back in Exodus 19. And so a himc is establishing kind of a minimum little thing here. And he he's trying to help the law look for a way to allow mercy without openly defying the law. Now, I want y'all to just think about this moment and juxtapose it against Instagram Christianity because not many people are going to be hashtagging this moment. I mean, have you ever noticed that people don't post things on social media like running for my life, lied at church, eating things I'm not supposed to, hashtag blessed. Instagram Christianity is all about the slingshots and the giants. But here, what first Samuel 21 is doing is showing us the behindthecene footage. Yeah, we get moments like that in our life sometimes, but a lot of our life is spent here in 1st Samuel 21 trying to deal and reckon with our fear and our problems. And the priest answered and said unto David, "There is no common ma bread under my hand, but there is hallowed bread for the young men who have kept themselves from women ceremonially." Look, and him's looking for ways to allow mercy to without openly defying law. And that tells us two things. That himch respects the law, but he also recognizes human necessity because already the text is setting up a deeper principle. The law is good. Exodus, Leviticus, it was never meant to starve God's people. It was never meant to abuse God's people. So David answers in a way that sounds good to the modern ear. Sounds odd to the modern ear. I'm sorry. He says, "And David answered the priest and said unto him, of the truth, women have been kept from us these three days since I came out, and the vessels of the young men are holy." What does that mean? Well, vessels is a euphemism for the body. And David saying, "Hey, look, we're ceremonial ceremonially clean. We're not defiled. Even though our mission feels ordinary, our condition is acceptable." And then comes a fascinating phrase. David says, "And the bread is in a manner common. Yay, though it were sanctified this day in the vessel." So David's logic is subtle but important. He's saying the bread is in a manner common. He's not claiming that the showbre has lost any of its sacred designation. Rather, what he's arguing for is that its present use no longer carries a ceremonial risk given the circumstances. The bread's already completed its function and according to the Levitical practice, it's going to be replaced weekly and once removed from the table before the Lord is typically eaten by the priest. David's point is is the bread is no longer actively engaged in sacred service. It's moved from a holy use to a holy remainder. And in that way, it's closer to common bread than the bread that was currently set before the Lord. And that next phrase kind of sharpens the argument. Yay, there are sanctified this day in the vessel. So David is acknowledging the tension that exists. Even if the bread, this is what he's saying, even if the bread was freshly consecrated, even if it was still warm on the oven sitting on that table of pure gold, there is a greater principle at work. Human needs, especially lifepreserving need, outweighs ritualistic observation. But David, David doesn't miss holiness. He's not dismissing the holiness. What he's doing is appealing to a purpose. That sanctification exists to serve God's redemptive purpose. To serve God's redemptive purpose, not to obstruct mercy. The Lord never meant to demand the starvation of his people. So what makes this moment so important is that David does not frame the argument in rebellion or entitlement. He speaks with reverence, restraint, humility. David never says, "I deserve the bread." He never pulls the I'm the future king. He says the situation requires discernment. He recognizes holiness, but he also recognizes this. Listen, holiness is not fragile. God's

I was in a conversation not too long ago And somebody says, "But that doesn't give God glory. That doesn't bring God glory." And it's like God's already glorious. You know, God will be God God is infinitely glorious. So So God's not threatened by an extension of mercy to somebody that you think is undeserving. Holiness is not fragile. And so the it says the priest gave him the hallow bread for there was no bread but the showbread that was taken from before the Lord. And so the so this is the moment where everything turns. It's a moment where we learn something important by God because God listen listen if I've lost your attention. Give it back to me. Pivotal moment. We learn something from God. God does not tell a tell him to come back when he's qualified. Thank the Lord. That is a good thing. God allows us to set apart to share what's been set apart. Not because the rules are meaningless, but because human need mattered more than the religious topics. And another thing, this is not about God lowering his standards. It's about God revealing his heart. God has always been more interested in feeding hungry people than preserving rituals. And this bread was meant to symbolize provision. And the bread that was meant to symbolize provision actually becomes provision. I mean, it's kind of useless to have a symbol saying God provides and then at the moment of greatest need, it's like except now. Jesus even points back to this moment later in the gospels and he's being criticized centuries later. Jesus himself points back to it because this moment that we're in with David in the showbread is actually pointing to Christ. And one day he's walking with the disciples on the Sabbath day and they're grabbing stalks of wheat and they're crumbling it between their hand which for some bizarre reason some rabbis got together and says well doing this well that's work. And then the Pharisees start to criticize him. And Jesus hearkens back to this exact moment. He says, "Have you not read where David took the showbread?" In other words, there's something greater at risk. The Sabbath, like the showbreed, was never meant to be a weapon against the hungry or the weary. And so, by appealing to God, Jesus is affirming God's holiness, is not threatened by compassion. It's displayed by it. And Jesus Jesus is saying, "Hey, you missed the point of the bread if you ever think it was about exclusion." So Jesus uses this story to reveal God's heart behind the law and the danger of religious systems that are detached from compassion. So let's put it another way. If if your interpretation of God's law causes people to starve, causes people to feel excluded, you've misunderstood the law and you're misapplying. And eventually Jesus is going to say something that is absolutely shocking. I am the bread of life, holy bread, bread that we can enjoy. Now, in other words, the one who was set apart gave himself for the ones who were least qualified. Let's keep on reading. Verse seven. Now a certain man of the servants of Saul was there that day, detained before the Lord, and his name was Doe the Edomite, chiefest of the herdsmen that belong to Saul. So I want y'all to notice something because scripture just kind of drops this in kind of leaves it alone. Scripture quietly inter introduces Doe to Edomite. No commentary, no explanation, just a warning label tucked into the text. And David doesn't know it yet, but this man will bring some destruction later on. And sometimes the most dangerous people in your story don't announce themselves. Sometimes God allows us to see later what we couldn't understand earlier. When Doag was there, David should have been going rutro. But we'll see what happens in a little while. Let's pick on back up. And David said unto Ahemc, "And is there not here under thine hand a spear or a sword? For I have neither brought my sword or my weapons with me, because the king's business here, we're still lying." The king's business required haste. And the priest said, "The sword of Goliath the Philistine,

whom thou slewest in the valley of Eli, behold, it is here wrapped in cloth behind the eph.

Thou will take take it, for there is no other to save that is here." So David is asking for weapons, and the Himalay brings out the sword of Goliath. The very weapon that once threatened David's life is now placed in his hand. I love that. And David says, "There is none like it. Give it to me." And that line, that line carries weight because in the middle of fear, God gently reminds David of a past victory. And sometimes God will remind you of what he's already done. It's not to shame you, but to study you. The same God who helped you has not changed. And church, this is huge. God's faithfulness does not expire when our confidence waivers. And and that sword was proof that fear won't get the final word. So it says in scripture verse 10, "And David arose and and fled that day for the fear of Saul and went to Aesh, the king of David."

Okay. First thing, this text is brutally honest because fear has begun to tunnel vision for David. It's causing David's vision to really narrow. God just gave you the sword of Goliath and it wasn't by stance trying to remind you of who you are. But David didn't look at the sword and go, "Oh yeah, I serve a big God. Oh yeah, I can stop running. God can deliver me. But fear once it gets hold kind of gives you tunnel visions and and that's a warning for us and in a way because past faith does not automatically cancel dig this past faith does not automatically cancel present anxiety.

David is not faithless here. He's overwhelmed. He knows Saul's power. He knows Saul's obsession. He knows Saul's reach. And in that moment, the weight of being hunted eclipses the memory of being delivered. The scripture doesn't sanitize this. It It lets us see that even God's anointed king can carry holy promises in one hand and trembling fear in the other. So David runs not just from Saul but from the place God has been sustaining him. And here's just like man what what are you thinking? He runs straight to Gath. Now alarm bells ought to be going off because Gath is Goliath's hometown. Gath is not neutral territory. Gath is not a safe zone. Gath again is God's I mean Goliath's hometown. And and what kind of in a way Gath is representing to us is human strategy that replaces spiritual discernment because David is not fleeing just anywhere. And this isn't kind of the irony is kind of intentional I think because David carries Goliath's sword into Goliath's city as if the symbol of the victory could now serve as protection. But but the faith, and this is what's striking me, is the faith that once trusted God alone is now hedging its bet. So David's thinking, hey, maybe this, you know, this is human strategy. Maybe Saul won't look for me there, which is strategically clever, but it's spiritually dangerous. And here's what the text seems to be quietly showing us. When fear is your leader, logic will follow. Fear leads, logic follows. And logic without trust leads us into the enemy's territory. And the moment shows that the symbols of God's past work are not substitutes for present dependence. The sword is real. The victory is real. The relics cannot replace dependence. And and David doesn't pray here. Not a single prayer. David David doesn't inquire of the Lord as he will later. He runs. And his running takes him straight into the arms of the enemy king Aesh who immediately who immediately recognizes the danger that David poses. And the very place David thought would provide safety actually became becomes a place where his life is in most peril. And one last thing about this before we move on. This verse reminds us that God's faithfulness is not undone by our fearful decisions. Y'all get that? God's faithfulness is not undone by our fearful decisions. God's David's choice here is flawed, but God remains present even in Gath. And in Gath, David's going to be humiliated. In Gath, he's going to be forced to feain insanity. In Gath, he's going to be stripped with his dignity. But he will survive. And the Lord is going to quietly teach him that deliverance does not come from geography. It doesn't come from the weapons. It doesn't come from his reputation. It comes from God alone. And this is going to be a painful detour. And sometimes when we make stupid decisions, we have to go through painful detours. But God is still at work. And that painful detour becomes part of David's formation. The shepherd king is learning that yesterday's victory must give way to today to today's trust. So here we are verse 11. And the servants of Akash said unto him, that's Akash. That this David king of the land. Did they not sing one to another of him and dances saying Saul has slain his thousands and David his 10 thousands. So David's trying to escape and dig this. Let's take it a step further. David runs to Gath trying to escape who he is. Y'all get that? He's trying to escape his identity, but his identity catches up with him because you can't outrun who you are, child of God. You can never outrun that. You can try, but the gifts of God are without and his calling are without repentance. And the very thing that he's trying to escape, his identity is catching up with him. So they recognize him. They even quote the song Saul is slaying his thousands. David is 10 thousands and suddenly David realizes something devastating. He has run from Saul straight into his reputation. And fear often promises anonymity, but it delivers exposure. And you can't stop being who God says you are just because you're scared. Verse 12. David laid up these words in his heart and underlined this and was sore afraid of Hayash the king of Gash because I want you to notice the progression. David is afraid of Saul, but he's sore afraid of Aesh, king, because fear multiplies when it becomes the decision maker. And when you don't feel safe with God, you're going to look for safety somewhere else. And this verse also kind of gives us a little bit of insight into David's inner world because David is thinking. He's replaying conversations. He's anticipating outcomes. This is not a reckless man. This is an overthinking man. fear has turned his mind into a courtroom where every thought is the worst case scenario witness. This is where it becomes painfully honest this moment because David believes God's promises but he doesn't feel God's presence and when faith becomes disconnected from the felt nearness of God people take refuge elsewhere. When faith becomes disconnected from the nearness, the felt nearness of God. When you feel disconnected to God, you're going to look somewhere else. Drugs, alcohol, illicit intimacy. You're going to find your identity somewhere else when you feel disconnected with God. When you you stop looking to him. And let's see what happens when fear makes you forget who you are. Verse 13 through 15. And he changed his behavior before them. David goes rutro. And he changes his behavior before them. And he fains himself mad in their hands and scrambled on the doors of the gate and let spittle fall down upon his beard. Then said Aash unto his servant, "Lo, you see the man is mad. Wherefore have you brought him to me? here. I I need mad men that you brought this fellow to play the mad man in my presence. Shall this fella come into my house? Y'all get it, right? So, David presents the picture of being completely insane. He's letting spit run down his beard. He's scratching doors. It's tragic. It's It's also strangely relatable because fear distorts your identity. It it it makes you forget what God said about you. And and yet David survived. No miracle announced, no fire from heaven, just survival. And and sometimes the miracle simply making it to the next chapter.

God never speaks in this chapter,

but he never leaves. And that may be one of the most comforting truths of all. God's faithfulness does not depend on flawless faith. David's escape not because he performed well, but because God has already written the ending. David's going to be king of Israel. And that points us to Jesus because where David lied, Jesus told the truth. Where David fled, when the enemies came, Jesus stood firm. And when David escaped death, Jesus walked into it. And so people like us, fearful, hungry, inconsistent, so people like us could live. Some of y'all are in 1st Samuel 21 season right now. You're not thriving. You're just surviving. Maybe you're wondering if God is disappointed. I want you to hear this clearly. God is not surprised. God has not changed his mind about you. God has written the end of the story. Sometimes faith looks just simply like not quitting

even in the face of all

we not in well keep on going and if your faith feels like 1st Samuel 21 right now good

There's a chapter 22 and a 22 and a 22. God does not stop writing because David had a bad day. All if all you can say is, "Lord, I'm tired. Lord, I'm scared." Let me tell you something. That prayer is enough to keep the story moving because God meets us. Even in chapter 21, if you'd like to serve the Lord as we do here at Camp Creek Church, a victorious Lord, we give you that chance as we stand and sing him Sure.

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